Johnny Pain - Swole

Johnny Pain - Swole

Citation preview

SWOLE: The Greyskull Growth Principles by John Sheaffer aka Johnny Pain


©2011 Villain Publishing

Table of Contents 4



Section One: The Growth Principles


Chapter One: Accountability


Chapter Two: The Base Layer and the Surplus


Chapter Three: The Importance of Food Quality


Section Two: The Growth Principles in Application


Chapter Four: The Lasagna Diet: Building it in Layers


Chapter Five: Tracking Progress


Chapter Six: Hungry Like the Wolf


Chapter Seven: A Few Notes on Training for Mass


Chapter Eight: Drugs




©2011 Villain Publishing

Introduction The decision to write this book came after working with several hundred people through phone consultations, seminars, via my internet forum, and in the personal training sector who shared the goal of adding significant amounts of quality muscle to their body without piling on a bunch of useless body fat in the process. This caveat was of particular concern to most due to either their own prior experience in attempting to pack on the muscle and “fat-fucking” themselves in the process, or simply from observing the lack of success others around them, either in person or on the internet, had in accomplishing the lean mass gain part of their goal without its ugly, fat, troll of a friend tagging along, being the cock-blocking third wheel. In addition to working with those who were trying to better fill out their shirts and look like they actually lift weights while wearing sweats in the winter time, I have an equal if not greater amount of experience in dealing with those who were misled or misguided one way or another on their quest for greater girth where it counts. These poor souls had fucked around wound up doughy sacks of slightly stronger, though much less attractive and confident, jiggly, abstinent Jello. There is a constant barrage of poor quality information on the subject of mass gain on the Internet, particularly within the communities in which these individuals are likely to find themselves as strength training beginners. It is then no surprise that they end up populating the wall of the club instead of finding themselves covered in glitter, making it rain on hoards of attractive women completely incapable of resisting their sheer primal masculinity and testosterone exhaust fume pheromones (ok, so the latter is not guaranteed or anything, at least not with this book, but a strong, muscular physique is definitely going to help you in the quest for that level of swag). A very common “progression” (to borrow a cliché used all to frequently in these circles today) of thinking and influence that many of those who seek my services undergo seems to be as follows: A guy decides that he wants to get in shape and look good so he pokes around online or by some other means and ends up joining a bizarre cult based around a sort of circuit training religion that promotes becoming “elite” and recommends a diet that is suitable for adequately feeding a small child who has had gastric bypass surgery for a few days to keep him alive but does not render him nutritionally capable of really doing any sort of extraneous movement. He soon finds himself devoid of any and all muscle mass, but in possession of a sweet six-pack (if he is genetically pre-disposed to have them show at low bodyweights). His drawers are full of board shorts, his closet full of shoes that look like gloves which serve as birth control for normal females but are ironically not needed for the females that he mates with, the gristly communal depositories that populate his cult headquarters. Their wombs are commonly incapable of bearing c